Humor

Don’t Let This Happen To You. I Got Catfished.

A costly online dating mistake anyone could make.

Photo by Valerie Elash on Unsplash.

All my friends are calling me stupid.

But I decided, screw them! It’s about time to spill the beans and open up about my trials and tribulations in the online dating world.

Being a genius is tough.

I excel at so many things in life. Like business, online writing, and Chinese checkers. You name it. I’m a master of a thousand hobbies.

Except… online dating.

Well, dating in general.

I guess you could say that love and relationships don’t come easy for me. They never have. And by the looks of my last experience, they never will.

Anyway… here’s the skinny.

I met this gorgeous girl online. Supermodel material, really. Blonde, big breasts, and a slender waist. Most men’s wildest wet-dream come true.

To protect her identity, I’ll call her Taylor.

Okay, I couldn’t come up with a good pseudonym. That’s her real name, I think.

The whole time that Taylor and I dated, she was hiding a dark secret. A secret she kept hidden exceptionally well.

I should’ve seen the red flags before it was too late.

But love is a strange beast. It blinds you. Hides the truth in plain sight. And our senses play tricks on us. While our heart flutters a million miles a minute over the prospect of being loved by someone.

Red Flag #1: She Avoided Talking On The Phone

The first red flag I missed was this.

Taylor never had the time to FaceTime or talk on the phone.

Of course, I was annoyed my long-distance girlfriend who lived two states away couldn’t talk to me. I was like a dog on a leash who couldn’t get that juicy steak. Because the chain was too short.

Taylor always told me she was too busy. Or too tired. Or that she wasn’t wearing makeup.

After all, she was a model for Victoria’s Secrets. That’s what she told me and I believed it. Plus, she had sexy photos…